October 29th

The BIG 5-0. That is what I will be celebrating this Saturday. My birthday brings mixed emotions for me with it. On the down side, that means that 50 of however many years God is giving to me are already gone. That means 5 decades or 21,250 days are behind me. Gone are my school days, the time that I was blessed to spend with my beloved Daddy and my grandparents. Gone are my childbearing days. Gone are my days with a much thinner figure. LOL! Gone is the short time that it took for me to fall totally in love with my Danley, the love of my life.

Whew, reading my writing would definitely get me depressed if I allowed it to. LOL!!!

Though I don't remember much about my 10th birthday, I remember that I was very happy to have been blessed with the greatest parents and grandparents. I had one beautiful little sister and another on the way. Life was good--no it was wonderful! I lived in a loving home where our parents made sure that we knew that we were the tops in their lives. There was never a shortage of any food in our home. Unfortunately, I took most of these blessings for granted. I had no idea just how "lucky" I was back then. My one and only problem was that I didn't have as many friends as I would have liked to have had. Back then, that was a MAJOR problem for a 10-year-old to have.

I remember the day that I turned 20. My whole life was ahead of me! I had just gotten married 5 months earlier. I was looking forward to many fun days ahead of me. At that young age, my husband and I already owned our own home and two nice vehicles. We both had jobs that we both enjoyed. I not only had the great family that God had given to me at birth, but now I also had a brand new family that became mine when Stan and I married. Still, I took so very much for granted...

I remember the day that I turned 30. I still felt like a kid. I definitely did not feel old in any way. Though God had not blessed me with a child in the natural way, He had given me a fantastic 10-year-old that we would soon adopt. We now owned our second home and had 2 good vehicles to get us to and fro. For the most part, my family was still intact and in good health. Unfortunately when I began my 31st year, my dear grandfather had been taken from us. I think that that was the first realization to me that life is really very short and just how much pain is produced when a loved one is lost. At that time, I had no idea that my Daddy would be the next to go on in just 4 short years. There was no way to prepare for that pain that would soon appear in my heart and in my soul.

That was also the decade that God would bless me with the gift of our first daughter, Leighlyn. It is said that God gives us someone new to love when he takes one love away from us. I believe that.

Less than a year later, I lost my grandmother. Nonny was an unbelievable lady. We had so much in common. To this day, I teach my children what she taught me about life and love. Adam and Leighlyn enjoyed their Grandmother-Nonny for a short time. Unfortunately, Abigayle never had the chance to meet her. But because of all of the stories that my family and I tell her about her great grandmother, she feels like she has known her forever.

When I was 40-years-old, God sent our dear sweet Abigayle into our life. Though getting her here was a tough ordeal, she was well worth it. Shortly before Abi was born, we discovered that I had a major heart problem. Doctors did not believe that either of us would survive if they did not deliver her much sooner than what we had planned. On April 17th of 2002, she made her grand entrance into our world. When Abi was just 6 weeks old, I had my heart surgery. At that time, we discovered that if it had not been for the stress and strain that my pregnancy had put on my heart, we NEVER would have known that I had this problem. Without Abigayle, I would have just died without ever having any symptoms that anything was wrong.

So now, as I begin my 6th decade, I am not taking my upcoming birthday as a bad thing or something to dread. I take on my next decade with great happiness that God has given me such an outstanding life with so very many gifts along the way. I do have to admit one thing though. I was beginning to get a bit down about my 50th a couple of weeks ago. I knew that I had to do something...ANYTHING...to boost my morale. Guess what I did! I went out and purchased a bottle of RED hair dye which Leighlyn used in my hair. Going from gray to red in one giant step was just what the doctor ordered for me. LOL!!! I am now looking forward to spending many more days with my wonderful family, friends (and hopefully, some grandchildren...soon)!

Stan, Mama, the girls and I have quite a weekend ahead of us. We're going to take in Coffin Days at Manitou Springs, Colorado on Saturday! What a way to celebrate life, huh? LOL!!!

Life is good and has given me so very much to be thankful for. Thank You, Lord!!!

VLE-B